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Also, thank you for taking the time to read this during work. Also if you’d like to take this opportunity to tell your female single co-workers about this blog, and ask them if they want to date me, I wouldn’t be mad. Fuck Eharmony.com, which I couldn’t believe was still available. Now the tricky thing about eharmony is, it takes two to tango. If that’s the case, please scroll down like 2 inches (that’s what she said) and get those words off your screen. Other titles include: “Dear Eharmony, because of you I’m going to have to reproduce through mitosis” “Dear Eharmony, I just bought the domain name Fuck Eharmony.com, no seriously, I did”| “Dear Eharmony, you took my money, dignity, and self respect, and all I got was this lousy blog” It’s true, I actually did buy the domain name So the purpose, the essence, of this blog, is that my eharmony subscription is ending this month. This is my second stint on eharmony.com, this last stint I signed up for 6 months. At first it’s awesome you have matches sent to you, which you review and if you like you can proceed to step 1, which is you send them multiple choice questions.
Think again: kids get up early, and lots of parents are awakened by a toddler face staring at them first thing in the morning.
"If I have a sitter lined up for Thursday night, it's not like a regular date where things can be moved on a whim.
Plus, you’ll develop meaningful friendships with other single parents, who, like you, are tired of hectic mornings and chaotic evenings, the kids fighting, and a never-ending to-do list.
Let’s face it, who has time to keep up with the latest hot spot or sign up for the newest online dating app only to find more disingenuous, nameless, faceless ‘matches’.
You invest hours chatting with someone who piques your curiosity, only to discover the photo they posted was from several years ago and a whole different version from what you anticipated meeting on your ‘hot’ date. Two dates where I was probably settling, compromising and giving in, just to go on dates. Not at all, they were perfectly normal, fine people, just not the match for me. It’s literally a 40 minute survey asking you the same question 37 different ways. First thing you have to do is fill out the SATs of online dating.Or an attractive member expresses a strong interest in you, but you later find out that he or she is currently married and just looking for a fling…or ‘separated’ but they spend the whole date answering calls from their ‘ex’.If you are frustrated by the online chit chat, then it’s time to take your search to a whole new level.Our extensive screening process ensures that you connect with people of integrity that you can trust.We will only qualify candidates for membership after they pass a screening process demonstrating they will not pose a threat to our members or their families.Plus, it is a big step that doesn't make sense in a casual situation."The biggest rule, for sure, is that they won't meet my kids. That’s always kind of awkward when you’re supposed to be “working”. You’re going to continue reading without telling any of your hot female co-workers? I had some other titles in work for this blog, but they just didn’t capture the essence of what I was trying to say. A “computer” matches you up based on “29 levels of compatibility”, which I’m fine with. Because you’re thinking, wow some super computer down at Eharmony headquarters is crunching vectors and differential equations just to find my perfect mate, and everyday you log in and see new matches, that you think are hand picked from the computer gods above. I mean, I feel bad if you’re at work right now reading this, and the biggest letters on your screen involve the words FUCK YOU. So after you completed their riddles and questions, you then can start receiving “matches”, hurray!