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Avid Life Media, the site’s parent company, is yet to announce a course of action.

One is old enough to be my mother and has a username that, without giving too much away, is an instruction to engage part of my mouth with a baked good she has in her possession.

Another user says she’s looking for: “A passionate one-night stand like there is no tomorrow”.

I’m also dismayed to find that Naughty Boy69 is also unavailable. Two hours later my inbox is still ringing hollow – not a single response.

Testing if the experience is gender-specific, I coax a female colleague (see right) into signing up to a rival site. On a separate account, posing as a woman, I get chatting to a male user.

You do this by being original and, above all, specific about your interests.

Instead of saying that you like sunsets, mention the best sunset you’ve ever seen. Have An Affair.” That is what I have spent the last three days trying to do.Millions of adulterous users of the website Ashley Madison – which bills itself as a dating site for married people – have spent this week worrying about having their membership and their cheating secrets revealed after a group calling itself Impact Team hacked into their profiles.He says he stayed with his partner only because she announced she was pregnant.“Being the nice guy I am, I offered to stick around,” he tells me.But they are outnumbered by a second group of twentysomethings who are just as straightforward.“A sugar daddy,” comes one succinct response to my introductory question. The site invites me to spend it at every turn, and users were even charged £15 to delete their profile prior to the hack.Priming myself not to lie or deceive, I set up a profile.I hit the first hurdle when both usernames Naughty Boy88 and Naughty Boy1988 are taken.” An unnerving number advertise themselves as “clean” and phrases such as “weekends are a no-go” are casually dropped in as a cold reminder of unknowing families who sit waiting for daddy to come home on Friday night.One user in his forties and working in finance says he wants to whisk me away for a weekend by the sea.

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