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If you take part in marital or family counseling during this time and the court finds that your chances of reconciliation are unlikely, it may hold a hearing before the 90 days is up.Should it be a crime for a public school teacher to have sex with one of her students? I felt like if we didn't do that, we just virtually made it open season on students that are 18-years-old." Most teachers don't need a criminal law to tell us that it's wrong to have sex with our students no matter how old they are (mine are in their 20's and 30's, and it's still wrong).“We’re probably more suspicious now than we used to be because there aren’t the restrictions, the social restrictions, the whole broad range of habits that kept people separate 50 or 60 years ago,” Berkowitz says.

Marriages were often arranged through families and preceded by formal “courtship.” Over the course of the 20 century, though, women entered previously male workplaces and outside-the-home dating became common.

And roles that were pioneering in the baby boom era are now the norm: Since 1967 (to pick one year of noted upheaval), the share of women in the labor force has gone from 39 percent to 58 percent, the share of women 18 to 24 who are enrolled in college has gone from 19 percent to 45 percent, and the average age at which women marry for the first time has gone from 21 to 27.

One of my friends’ neighbors recently told him a provocative story about cable repair.

Apparently this neighbor—let’s call him Bill—had waited for hours at home for a repairman; finally, the cable company called to announce its representative’s impending arrival just as Bill was about to leave on an errand.

It became clear on our email chain, and in my own conversations with a number of friends and colleagues about the subject, that for some (but not all) people (both men and women), the situations described just don’t seem quite right. Said one about the idea of a man he didn’t know well socializing with his wife: “My reaction would be to act like I’m cool with it then insult him constantly when he’s not around.” None of my sources hold especially conservative beliefs about sexual relationships or roles.

Several said they’d be uncomfortable if their spouse or partner engaged in certain interactions without them and/or felt their spouses might not be happy with them if they did the same. In many parts of the world, of course, ideas about what married people can and can’t do are enforced by religious and legal authorities (mostly to the detriment of women), but no one here was suggesting that they were uneasy about the mere idea of men and women (or gay men and women and other gay men and women, as it were) being alone together.What if an attractive area parent brought his or her kid over for a play date while you were at work?What if you were out of town for the weekend and your spouse and a single friend went to see the buzzy movie du jour?You also may file in the state if you’ve been a resident of a military base there for six months. Yes, if you have children, the state will not grant you a divorce until at least 90 days after you file, unless you can provide a good reason why the waiting period should be waived.You must file in the county in which you or your spouse has been a resident for at least 30 days. The court may require you and your spouse to attend a parenting education program during this time.Bill, by his own account, responded that there was When my friend shared this story with me and several others via email, all agreed that there is nothing improper about a married person being home with a Comcast specialist when his/her husband/wife is away. If we’re going to start making rules about when who is and isn’t allowed to fix the cable, the cable’s never going to get fixed.But my friend raised the stakes by proposing similar hypothetical situations that weren’t as easy to dismiss.Now that happens, but it doesn’t mean that the spouses are not concerned.” As my unscientific survey indicates, jealousy can easily lead to hurt feelings and misgivings even if adultery isn’t committed or even contemplated.As it happens, Stephanie Coontz actually told me she had heard of husbands in the 1950s and ’60s “forbidding their wives to have repairmen or survey-takers in their homes when they were not there.” She added that such attitudes were not widespread even at the time, and that in some cases “it was the women who were afraid to have a strange man in the house or even on the porch, rather than the man being jealous.” The lesson here, maybe, is that there’s never been a clear standard, even an unwritten one, on when and where we’re supposed to avoid nonsingle people—and for whose benefit we’re doing so.(If you go all the way back to the era of the Assyrians, Berkowitz’s book says, “any man who ‘traveled’ with an unrelated woman had to pay money to her husband and prove—sometimes by jumping into a swiftly flowing river and surviving—that he had not taken the woman as a sexual partner.”) While some adultery laws are still technically on the books, the government is for the most part no longer concerned about what adults do with each other behind closed doors.No-fault divorce laws were widely adopted in the 1970s, which is also around the time that adultery prosecutions became increasingly unheard of.

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